I don’t get waves of missing you anymore
They’re more like tsunami tides in my eyes

I will open up my heart
And let the Healer set me free

Much better day today even though I’m sooo hungry Im probably not going to be able to sleep.
Will blog deep thoughts tomorrow. Although I’ll tell you this, if you are looking for an awakening or spiritual revival in your life… There’s nothing like a bit of physical hunger to reveal what youre actually like and get you HUNGRY for God.
What do you guys think about fasting?

Oh boy.
Let’s just say, the best bit of my day was eating pie. And that really disappoints me.
I keenly set my alarm for 6am, as I wanted to have 1 hour with God before the rest of the day began. Spiritual food before physical food.
Well, when the alarm went off at 6am I was not in as a convicted mood as I was when I set it! I managed to crawl out of bed into my dear old Nana’s chair at 10 past. I sat there for a few minutes and wondered what I would do with this new found time with God.
It was weird. The Person Id been living my life for years and years… And all of a sudden I realized He was a stranger. Sure, I’d read my bible. Sure, I’d shoot up random prayers whenever i needed help. Sure, He’d been the topic of endless conversations at bible studies, discussion groups etc… But when was the last time I set aside time for the two of us, really? When was the last time I waited on the Lord, and listened to Him? I’m embarrassed at the answer.
What do I even want to be praying for? Really really praying for? I hadn’t thought about this in ages… Thinking it was because of my “lack of time”. Yeah right.
I whispered out a short prayer, Lord help me to understand Your word. Reading through the pages of Luke. And I was bored. Don’t get me wrong - I was shocked and ashamed at the fact I was bored. I was looking at my bed, longing to return to its warm embrace. Prayed “Lord I want to want you… Help me to want you”. Next thing I knew it was 6:40 and I was back in bed…
7:50 and mum comes in wondering when I’m getting up. Guilt floods over me… “I’ve failed”

My friend and I went out on campus today doing a survey… And as we were explaining the KGP I was convicted anew at how God wants to know ME personally. And here I am, busy in ministry and service, but am I living closely with the One I’m doing it for? Reminded of Luke 10 with Jesus, Mary and Martha. Martha busy and distracted by all the chores to do… Mary sitting at Jesus’ feet listening to Him. Jesus tells us that Mary has chosen what is better.
Oh, to spend time daily sitting at Jesus’ feet listening to what He has to say. I want this, deep down somewhere. But the passion gets lost in amongst my laziness and the tv shows and websites that entertain me for a few hours at the most.
Truly felt the spiritual battle inside of me today. And tomorrow I expect to even greater as I plan to fast.

How are you guys going in your personal relationships with God? I’d love to hear your struggles or perhaps encouragement you’ve found from walking closely with God lately.

It’s only God who can awaken this desire in us and I pray that he really will. Life is life to the FULL knowing Jesus… I want to not only be intellectually convicted of this, but in all areas of my life.

Little by little…